Tenacity is frequently defined as “the refusal to give up, especially when dealing with opposition”.
There are are numerous tips and techniques for bringing about change and becoming a lot more confident because of this. We can only make progress by giving up old habits in favour of the new ones; by altering old beliefs. It demands a distinct sort of determination.
The resistance we encounter here comes from inside.
We can be our own worst enemy.
We become expert at finding ‘evidence’ to support our current beliefs and talking ourselves into retaining them. Discussions like “I knew that would happen,’ ‘It’s usually the same”. And worst of all, “‘I’m never any good at doing that kind of thing.’ Therefore we form a comfort zone that puts a restriction on our talents.
We have to choose knowingly to set ourselves new beliefs and persevere with ourselves in embracing them.
- Write down a belief you’ve got that stops you performing at your best (“I can’t enter a room full of strangers.”, as an example).
- Write down the self-talk that goes with this perception (“I am hopeless at this.”).
- Identify the comfort zone this puts you in (“Meeting strangers fills me with dread so I do not include it within my set of skills.”).
- State the alternative of your restricting thinking (“I look forward to strolling into a space filled with total strangers and really feel genuinely positive about doing so.”).
- Write down the brand new and constructive self-talk that matches this thinking (“Walking into a space filled with total strangers is one thing I feel confident about.”).
- Describe the new and expanded comfort zone this places you in.
- What is it like having this new thinking?
- Visualise yourself when you have this new belief (“I see myself strolling right into a room full of total strangers, being welcomed and speaking confidently.”).
- As someone with this new found perception, take a stroll and act as if you are experiencing this new understanding; become your new belief.
Now persevere until eventually the new perception becomes your own “real belief”.
John Sproson works as a company coach and mentor to create self-confidence in expert business individuals and in organisational teams. He writes extensively on the internet and blogs on how to develop self confidence and uses a solution focussed approach.